Two very different films this time with common themes of Americans abroad in Europe. One terrible, one very good.
THE TOURIST is a glossy, well-promoted piece dominated by two stars putting in Oscar-deserving performances.
The first is Angelina Jolie's bottom. No, not Angelina, often a fine actress. Her bottom. Am I being sexist? No, I am mocking the sexism in this dire movie's production values. Never has a talented actress been filmed so often from behind. Costume design and shot selection work together to make this a truly wonderful bottom performance. We see Jolie's rear in wide shot and in close-up. Standing still and walking away. Draped in a tight skirt and in a flowing, clinging gown.
Early on in the film Jolie, or rather her bottom, are being watched on CCTV by a French Police surveillance team. French Cop 1 zooms the camera in on The Bottom, joking in ribald fashion to French Cop 2. Senior Cop berates them both: "Can we not be more professional here?" Good question. Presumably the focus on this feature of Jolie is to distract us from the appalling story, whose plot has holes big enough to drive, well, a Venice motor boat through.
For the other and even more impressive performance comes from the city of Venice, where most of the action is set. Like many films nowadays THE TOURIST functions most effectively as a high-end tourism advert. (See my review of the KARATE KID remake / advert for China.)
All the most famous tourist locations are shot, always beautifully, often at early light or late in the day. Bridge of Sighs? Tick. St Mark's? Tick. Piazza San Marco? Tick. Make sure the punters know about the canals? Lots of speed boat chases, tick? Yawn. Final draft of the script must have come from the Venice Tourist Board.
The rest of Jolie is not bad. And Johnny does, well, Johnny, though a bit tubbier than in the past, it must be said. So millions of people will pay to see this awful film. A cynical piece of money making by casting - two huge stars, kerching!
One pretty town, and two pretty stars, but what ruins the movie is the absurdity of the unbelievable plot.
For starters we have the trope so familiar in heist / caper / action movies. Characters are chased across this major European city for 15 minutes or more at a time with constant fire from automatic weapons. But there are no bystanders. No one calls the Police. No one minds. They are just left to do their thing and blast away.
Exciting action to those who assume busy European tourist destinations are full of drawn out gun battles with no intervention from the forces of law and order. Especially bizarre given that most of the rest of the time the film features various police officers busy at work. Even when Johnny jumps off a building upon what does he fall? Why a police officer. They must all be on an espresso break when the gunfire starts.
Even worse is the denouement. Without giving the game away, this is all about various people pursuing each other, at the centre of which are (a) a large amount of money and (b) a mystery about someone's identity. Thus to the surprise twist ending. It's certainly a surprise as it makes no sense whatsoever.
It will work very well for people with amnesia who have just forgotten the previous hundred minutes or so. They will go, "Oh, wow!!!" very loudly. Almost worth you seeing this seasonal turkey just to check out the absurdity of the conclusion. Think back to all the scenes hitherto between Jolie and Depp and ask yourself, can I believe that ending?
ON TOUR
This quirky piece stars, is co-written, co-produced, and directed by google-eyed French actor Mathieu Amalric. Less well known in the UK, Amalric is a big star in his home country and recognised as a multi-faceted talent.
ON TOUR is an excellent film, set in France, but delivered mostly in English. It's narrative structure and ambiguities make it typical of traditional European film, but it's bouncing pace and mix of drama and humour more redolent of Hollywood make it a satisfying hybrid. It's a road movie with a difference.
The set up is cute. Amalric's Joachim Zand is a sleazy bum, a chain-smoking, former celebrity TV producer who fled France for the USA leaving behind debts, much animosity, and some mystery. He has found a new role and a new 'family' as an impressario, touting a bunch of female Burlesque artists on a tour of France.
This is his first return home, and bit by bit he has to confront his past. Bit by bit the secrets emerge. Minute by minute he becomes more repulsive as we, and his performers, get to know him. Yet at the same time Amalric's subtle performance means we stay with him, we feel sympathy. Where will the tour, and Joachim himself, end up?
The second narrative strand in the film is his relationship with the women. One of them explains "This is the new burlesque - women performing for women, being who we are". We cannot help but notice though the many men in the audience and that the women tend to remove their clothes.
But the women are very clear their act is about expressing themselves. And tensions with Joachim develop over artistic control. "This is OUR show", they repeatedly protest whenever he gives feedback or makes suggestions. "But this is MY country" he replies. Time and again we see him away from them, fighting, sometimes literally, to find venues, to win gig dates. This is the classic producer versus performer battle, with nipple tassles.
THE TOURIST focuses on plot to disastrous effect. ON TOUR's strength is its focus on character and relationships. Not just a road movie but a group movie. We learn about the major characters as we go along. As they fight and make up, argue and insult, then support each other. This is quite gritty stuff. These people behave badly. A nightmare if they are in the same hotel as you. But, as with real human beings, they all have that other side. Vulnerable but loving. Possessed of ability and creativity but plagued by doubt.
Like all good road movies the journey here is really life itself. Not just about where we end up, but what will we do along the way.
My only criticism is that as the film proceeds the focus on Amalric's Joachim increases to the detriment of that ensemble element. Perhaps hard to avoid given Amalric's huge presence behind the camera. But we can forgive that as ON TOUR reveals so pleasurably the extent of Amalric's abilities. And because of the excellence of the five burlesque performers - funny, strong, weak, appalling, vulgar, caring, talented . . .
You will enjoy ON TOUR. And you will want to visit the seaside hotel where the film ends. Check it out.
